Cole Porter: We have seen a lot of action so far tonight, and we are all set for another great matchup between Alex Grey and Will The Thrill!

Erik Channel: Did you just say Will The Thrill?

Cole Porter: Yeah, Erik. Will The Thrill is back in EPW and he is set to face Alex Grey.

Erik Channel: Will The Thrill? Well, I know this match is going to be boring.

Cole Porter: Well, we can’t keep talking all night because it’s time for our next match.

Erik Channel: Let’s just get this match over with. I have better things to do.

[The camera focuses in on the Evovision as AC/DC’s “Shoot to Thrill” starts to pump through the arena. The screen starts to flash the letters W.I.L.L. then they roll to T.H.R.I.L.L. before Will The Thrill becomes fixated in the center of the screen. Out on the stage, Will staggers still showing signs of being assaulted by Oliver Ranken earlier in the show. The fans show respect for Will with their applause and adulation.]

YAAAAAAAHH!!!

Michael Sharpe: The following match is scheduled for one-fall! Introducing first, making his way to the ring, from Toronto, Ontario, Canada, and weighing in at 210 pounds, WILL THE THRILL!!!

Erik Channel: What is everyone on the roster from Canada?

Cole Porter: I am not sure about that, but what I am sure about is that Will The Thrill is still feeling the effects of the attack from Ranken earlier on in the night. He’s a competitor though, and he isn’t going to use that as an excuse for him not to compete tonight against Alex Grey.

Erik Channel: Well, he should have just saved us all the time and not shown his face out here and we could have just declared Alex Grey the winner. Now we have to sit through this match.

Cole Porter: Don’t talk like that, Erik. This is going to be a great contest between two talented superstars here in EPW.

Erik Channel: If by great, you mean boring, then I agree with you.

[The camera returns to Will The Thrill who had now made his way to the ringside area. Reaching out to the fans, he slaps as many hands as he has can while walking to the ring. With very little showmanship Will The Thrill slides under the bottom rope and takes his place in the corner that John Crawford directs him to. While all attention is refocused on the entranceway, Mr. Crawford checks Will’s waist and boots for foreign objects.]

Cole Porter: Will The Thill is just going to have to fight through the pain here tonight.

Erik Channel: I know what he is going through.

Cole Porter: What does that mean?

Erik Channel: It means that you are a giant pain in the…

[Cole Porter interrupts Erik Channel.]

Cole Porter: Hold on just a minute. This is a family show.

Erik Channel: It is?

[Cole Porter ignores Erik Channel.]

Cole Porter: Well, here comes Will The Thrill’s opponent.

[As if on cue “You Wouldn’t Know” by Hell Yeah starts to fill the arena. The fans reaction is lukewarm for the man known as Alex Grey as he walks out on stage. The scarred face of EPW, Alex Grey takes center position on the entrance.]

Michael Sharpe: And his opponent, from Kansas, and weighing in tonight at 200 pounds, ALEX GREY!!!

[The fans show a little more feeling as Alex starts down to the ring.]

Cole Porter: I have been told that it has been some time since Alex Grey has been in a wrestling ring.

Erik Channel: Well, he better not use that as an excuse if he loses to Will The Thrill.

[Alex reaches the ringside steps and walks up. He stops on the apron before stepping between the ropes and looks over Will The Thrill. Mr. Grey rolls his head around his neck smirking. Finally he returns to stepping through the ropes which happens to be his assigned corner. The mysterious Mr. Grey started limbering up in his corner when John Crawford walks over to check him for foreign objects.]

Cole Porter: Referee John Crawford is making sure that Alex Grey doesn’t have any concealed weapons on him.

Erik Channel: If you need a weapon to beat Will The Thrill, then you don’t belong in EPW.

Cole Porter: What is your problem with Will The Thrill?

Erik Channel: I just don’t like his name. I think it’s stupid… and he’s stupid for coming up with it.

Cole Porter: Regardless of what you think, this match is about to get underway. I don’t know about you, but I have a job to do.

[Both men walk out to the center of the ring where Mr. Crawford addresses both of them before signaling for the starting bell.]

[The bell sounds.]

Cole Porter: There’s the opening bell.

Erik Channel: Is it over yet?

[Inside the ring Alex Grey and Will The Thrill meet with a collar and elbow tie up. Though giving up ten pounds Grey displays his strength backing Will into the ropes. With the advisement of Mr. Crawford Alex Grey breaks, giving Will room to get his legs back under him.]

Cole Porter: Now there’s some sportsmanship. It’s great to see…

Erik Channel: Who cares what the referee says? He shouldn’t have let up on him.

Cole Porter: Well, I don’t think that he wants to get disqualified here.

[Again the two competitors tie up and again, Alex Grey imposes his will. Only Will feels his way to reversing Grey around and sticking him in the turnbuckle. Before Crawford even says anything Will already broke the hold. Standing in the center of the ring he smiles at Grey and invites him back for another go round.]

Cole Porter: Whoa there Mister Grey, it looks like this isn’t Will’s first dance.

Erik Channel: Dance? This is wrestling, not dancing.

Cole Porter: It’s a figure of speech. Whatever.

[Not one for being shown up, Grey obliges Will with another collar and elbow tie up this time both men set their feet and start jockeying for position. Again Grey seems to be slightly stronger and he pushes Will back into the ropes. This time however Grey doesn’t allow for a break and connects with a right hand to Will’s face.]

Erik Channel: Finally some action!

[Quickly capitalizing Grey shoots Will into the ropes as Will rebounds Grey sets up to the side, when Will runs out Alex drops cutting Will’s feet out from under him. Grey springs to his feet and lands a leg drop over the back of Will’s neck.]

Cole Porter: Drop toe hold into a leg drop, Alex Grey seems to have shaken off the ring rust.

Erik Channel: I had a car once that was covered in rust.

[Inside the ring Alex Grey pulls Will back to his feet, Alex locks in a front face chancery to which Will rolls under his arm locking Grey’s wrist and wrapping it around his back. Will releases the wrist lock when Grey shoots an elbow, to which Will ducks and side steps. When Grey turns Will attempts a superkick, Grey slaps his boot to the side sending Will spinning, when Will fully turns Grey wraps his arm around his neck and locks his left leg to Will’s right.]

Cole Porter: There’s a Side Russian Leg Sweep!

[Seeing his chance to score a quick win Grey floats over Will and locks his leg. John Crawford slides into position and checks the shoulders of Will The Thrill.]

1…

[Crawford again checks the shoulders and again his hand slaps the mat.]

2…

[Before Crawford could check the shoulders Will kicks out and lifts his shoulder from the mat. John Crawford holds two fingers in the air as Alex Grey again grabs Will by the head.]

Erik Channel: That was three, wasn’t it?

Cole Porter: No, it was only two. This match isn’t over yet.

[Will rolls to his side and hits Alex in the face with an elbow. As Grey staggers back to one knee Will pops to his feet. Throwing caution to the wind he shoots into the ropes, right as Alex Grey gets his wits about him Will connects with a dropkick that sends Grey sliding back under the bottom rope.]

Cole Porter: Will got a full head of steam behind that dropkick.

Erik Channel: That was actually almost impressive.

[Seeing an opportunity Will swiftly returned to his feet, with no hesitation he shot in the direction of the corner and ran up the ropes, when he reached the top he leaped back turning 180 degrees and landing a leg drop across the chest of the prone Alex Grey.]

Cole Porter: Oh my god! Did you see that?

Erik Channel: Actually, no. I wasn’t paying attention.

[For a second Will The Thrill falls back into the guardrail to which the fans slap his chest and cheer.]

HOLY SH*T!!!
HOLY SH*T!!!

Cole Porter: I can’t believe Will is back on his feet.

[Will gets back to his feet and rolls back into the ring. Alex Grey uses the ropes to pull himself back upright, and then leans against them. Will takes a breath and fires himself into the rope across from Grey, Will rebounds off the ropes, seeming to turn it up a gear, Grey shows he was playing possum and pulls the middle rope down. Will flips through crashing to the concrete.]

Cole Porter: That had to hurt.

Erik Channel: Ha! He tricked him! I can’t believe that moron just fell for that!

[Grey quickly drops and rolls under the bottom rope to the floor. Will makes it back to all fours where he is met with a strong boot to the ribs by Alex Grey. Will winces in pain but remains on his hands and knees, reaching up he grabs Grey by his trunk line and delivers a shot to his lower abdomen. With his momentum halted Alex folds over and on his way up Will connects with a shot to the side of Grey’s head. With Grey dazed Will leaps onto the guardrail, using his agility Will shoots back and nails Alex in the face with the side of his boot. For the effort the crowd gives a standing ovation.]

YAAAAAAAHH!!!

Cole Porter: Both of these young men just refuse to lose.

Erik Channel: Damn, this match is going to last all night.

[Both men slowly return to their feet. Will is the first back inside the ring rolling under the bottom rope. Closely following suit is Alex Grey who slides in and goes directly to his knees. Will The Thrill shakes loose the cob webs and returns to his feet about the same time Alex Grey does. Again both men return to the center of the ring. The crowd’s appreciation is cut short when Alex Grey and Will The Thrill tie up again.]

Cole Porter: And they are right back where they started from.

Erik Channel: The cycle of boredom continues.

[This time the collar and elbow results in Will The Thrill taking the advantage with a side headlock. Reacting quickly Grey wraps Will in a side waist lock to which he easily executes waist lock suplex. Only Will refuses to let go of the headlock, he still holds tightly to the head of Alex who now lies face down.]

Cole Porter: Will shows some tenacity.

Erik Channel: If by tenacity you mean panic, then yeah he showed it.

[Grey manages to wrestle some leverage, getting back to his knees. This time, instead of trying to slam his way out Grey opts to land a few stiff shots to the ribs of Will, shots which take their toll causing Will to loosen his grip. Which consequently results in Will being whipped into the ropes, Alex fires into the ropes running parallel. With all his force Grey launches into the air and levels Will with a twisting elbow.]

Cole Porter: There’s a Spinning Back Elbow by Grey!

[Grey allows no time for analysis, directly returning to Will with a sharp boot into his side. Grey barely allows time for the boot to be felt before snatching Will up by his head. Will breaks loose and attempts a wild shot which Alex easily ducks. Using his momentum against him Grey grabs Will around the waist continuing the spin Grey slams Will to the canvas with a little extra something.]

Cole Porter: There’s the Sidewalk Slam.

Erik Channel: Hey, this guy is really taking it to Will.

[Will tries to respond, shooting back to a sitting position only to have Alex spring from his left foot to his right in a circle, finally delivering a left heel to the forehead of Will The Thrill. Will slams back to the mat his head bouncing off of the canvas. Alex surveys the situation and drops to his knees before covering and hooking the leg of Will The Thrill. John Crawford slides back into position and checks both shoulders before starting the count.]

1…

[Again Crawford checks the shoulders before slapping his hand back to the canvas.]

2…

[Will shows little life again as Crawford checks the shoulders, his hand flies towards the mat before Will shoots his left shoulder off of the mat. John Crawford immediately throws two fingers back into the air.]

Cole Porter: Another two-count.

Erik Channel: What? He should have had him there.

[Looking frustrated Alex Grey punches Will The Thrill in the face to which John Crawford reprimands him.]

Cole Porter: I think Alex Grey is starting to get a little upset.

Erik Channel: I’m starting to get upset. I can’t believe that it is taking him this long to beat Will The Thrill.

Cole Porter: The man just doesn’t know the meaning of the word, quit.

[Ignoring the warning Alex again connects to the side of Will’s head with a right hand. Alex returns to his feet, and immediately shoots into the ropes. With Will laying flat on his back Alex connects with a dropkick to the side of Will’s head.]

Cole Porter: Alex Grey hit his mark with that dropkick.

Erik Channel: He might have knocked a couple of teeth loose with that one.

[With no wasted motion Grey pulls Will back up from the mat. Desperation is the only word that can describe the punch that Will attempts. Alex Grey, using his keen vision, side steps the blow by dropping to one knee. Grey then attacks again, lunging up from his knees to connecting to Will’s head with a knee.]

Cole Porter: What a shot!

[Reeling from the shot, Will still displays heart by bouncing back to his feet. Alex Grey, ever the opportunist, sneaks wrapping his arm around the neck of Will, he sets his back leg again and snaps Will to the mat whipping his head back into the canvas.]

Cole Porter: Alex Grey is starting to take control of this match after that Side Russian Leg Sweep.

Erik Channel: He can control the match all he wants. What he needs to do is go for a pin and end this thing already.

[Grey looks down over the body of Will, after a few seconds of deliberation, he forgoes the pin and lands a strong boot to Will’s midsection. Again he lands a boot before shooting off into the ropes. Grey rebounds with assertiveness and throws his legs out crashing down with a head of steam.]

Cole Porter: There’s a Viscous elbow.

Erik Channel: I know that I said that he should be going for the pin here, but I am enjoying seeing Will The Thrill being beaten within an inch of his life.

Cole Porter: Well, Alex Grey has been ruthless thus far.

[Grey springs back to his feet, reaching down, he grabs Will’s leg and pulls him into the center of the ring. Grey walks over and pulls himself up to the second rope. He takes aim and leaps off the ropes nailing Will perfectly in the throat. Alex shakes off the impact and hooks Will’s leg. Crawford drops down and checks both shoulders, his hand slaps the canvas.]

1…

[Again Crawford checks the shoulders. Again his hand slaps down.]

2…

[Crawford checks the shoulders and his hand begins its descent.]

Erik Channel: There it is! He got the three-count!

[Will The Thrill barely gets his shoulder off of the mat as John Crawford’s hand gets an inch away from counting the three.]

Cole Porter: He got the shoulder up! This one is not over yet!

Erik Channel: That can’t be!

[Grey lifts up and sits back on his knees. Showing some frustration he pleads his case on the deaf ears of John Crawford. Realizing there was no future in his course of action Grey lands a shot to the face of Will The Thrill. After a second shot Grey pulls Will back to a front face chancery, with a swift shot to the ribs Grey tosses Will’s left arm over his shoulder and snaps Will over.]

Cole Porter: A beautiful Snap Suplex there by Grey!

[Staggered and dazed, Will somehow works back to his feet. He then turns towards Grey where he is caught by him. Wrapping his right arm across the neck and locking his boot around Will’s shin, Alex Grey jerks Will face first into the mat.]

Cole Porter: Front Russian Leg Sweep… that’s his set up move!!

[Grey slinks into the background of the corners positioning himself directly behind the half unconscious Will The Thrill. Will who shows valiant resiliency by pushing back to his knees, then finally to his feet. Wrapping his left arm around Will’s neck he uses his right to fold Will’s left arm back into a chicken wing. Grey jerks and pulls trying to wear down Will. Grey suddenly sets his feet and drops his ass whipping Will over his head and crashing down head first into the mat.]

Cole Porter: The Shades of Grey!

Erik Channel: Whoa! That was crazy!

[With Will The Thrill laying on his head and shoulders Alex Grey falls back locking both of Will’s legs as John Crawford checks the shoulders he starts the count.]

1…

Erik Channel: There is no way that he is going to get up after that one.

[Again John Crawford checks the shoulders; again his hand slaps the canvas.]

2…

Cole Porter: There’s the two.

[John Crawford sees both shoulders still down and again his hand smacks the canvas.]

3!!!

Cole Porter: And we have a winner!

Erik Channel: That’s it!

[The Evovision replays the execution of Shades of Grey being applied and then the impact of Will The Thrill into the mat.]

Cole Porter: Well you see right here Alex locks in that choking chicken wing, and then boom! Heels over head he went and from there it was academic.

Erik Channel: He really laid a beating on Will The Thrill towards the end of that match.

Michael Sharpe: Here is your winner, ALEX GREY!!!